Stick To What You’re Good At Please.

Everywhere I go these days, which isn’t far or many places, everyone is selling shit they know fuck all about. And they are doing it badly too. Why don’t these companies stick to doing what they do best. On a recent trip to the supermarket they had run out of carrots but I could get a shirt and tie in eight different colours if I wanted one, what the fuck for? To replace the carrots? Perhaps if they hadn’t been so fuckin’ worried about shirts and all the other pish they sell these days they might have bothered their hole to order and take care of the fruit and veg section. If I want a shirt and bloody tie I will go to a tailors not a supermarket.

Then I started looking at the leaflets at the checkout. Mortgages - no thanks I’ll use a bank, “Oh Sir, we are a bank”. Fuck right off, you’re a supermarket. If I take a mortgage with Sainsbury’s does that mean they can come and put a mini-mart on my front garden?

Supermarkets are for food - not cd’s, dvd’s, clothes, garden furniture, shoes, tv’s, printers, banking, internet, insurance blah blah blah. FOOD ONLY PLEASE THANK YOU

Today I popped to my local Post Office to buy stamps, after making my purchase and heading to the exit door a polite voice calls “Do you have a minute Sir?”, I did and like clockwork the sales pitch begins. “We at the Post Office would like to offer you a great deal” - Really? Discount stamps maybe? My arse. “Have you seen the ads on TV for our new telephone service?” Eh, no. “Yes the Post Office is now offering discount telephone services blah blah blah”. Now as he’s chattering on to me like I’m a fucking retard I’m thinking, you’re a saleman, fair enough but why are you talking to me like I know hee haw about telephones? If I’m not mistaken many years ago The GPO (General Post Office) ran the UK’s telephone network, BT was then privatised in 1984, so to me the Post Office gave up telephone services 22 years ago but now I am being primed to “help my local Post Office remain open” by signing up for this “great new service”, he went on to tell me how awful BT were, how they were ripping me off and all I was doing was making their shareholders richer.
I AM A BT SHAREHOLDER.
You could have taken a deep breathe and blown the baldy prick over when I said that to him. Though I took my hat off to him when he drew breathe and said “So you’re a loyal BT customer Sir?” - Right on fuckstick now go sell some first class stamps and leave me alone.

The Post Office is for mail, stamps, parcels - not car and travel insurance, loans, telephone services.
MAIL SERVICES ONLY PLEASE

Where does it all end? It won’t if we keep encouraging these companies by signing up to their bollocks.